How To Make Your New Year’s Resolutions Actually Stick

Key Points:

  1. Tangible Goals System
  2. Internal Motivation
  3. Self-Compassion

Have you ever set a New Year’s resolution filled with determination and ambition, followed by a shattering crash? I have! 

Setting a resolution is a big deal and can surely contribute to our sense of ambition and fulfillment. However, we tend to set goals that are completely doomed for failure. Read more for tangible tips to help your resolutions actually stick.

Tangible Goals System

Think of a goal you want in your life. Now, take that goal and break it into smaller goals (the more the merrier!). It is crucial to differentiate between what is and what is NOT in your control. These simple but mighty tips help our goals to become realistic, attainable, and practical. The more specific and distinct your system is, the greater the probability of following through with your goals. 

Internal Motivation

Consistent momentum’s best friend is internal or intrinsic motivation. Odds are, when we’re preoccupied on what the world thinks we “should” be doing, our motivation comes in spurts. Meaning, we are likely to experience that crash. If your motivation is coming from a place inside of you, it’s intrinsic and its lasting. Learning how to access that place inside of us can be easier said than done. Psychotherapy can be a great tool to help us strengthen our sense of self, improve our identity resilience, and learn how to differentiate between internal and external motivators. CFIR professionals are here to help you do just that, and more.


Don’t let a lapse turn into a relapse. Allow the setbacks to happen and then get back on track. Prioritizing self-compassion leaves us with the realistic wiggle room we need when it comes to attaining a goal. It can also help us to manage our expectations, eagerness, and feelings of guilt. Self-compassion is not based on positive judgements or evaluations, it is a way of relating to ourselves. The motivational power of self-compassion is the difference between working hard to grow and to learn vs. needing to impress ourselves and/or the world.

Natasha Vujovic, RP (Q). is a Registered Psychotherapist (Qualifying) at CFIR. She works with individuals and couples experiencing a wide range of psychological and relational difficulties including anxiety and stress, depression, mood and grief, relational conflict, trauma, life transitions, personality, body-image, marital and pre-marital, internal conflicts, family dynamics and self-esteem. Natasha is an integrative therapist pulling from psychodynamic/analytic theories and takes a collaborative and honest approach to session.

Motivation vs. Intention: Do You Lack the Drive to Set Personal or Professional Goals?

by: Erin Leslie, EQ-i Certified | Coach

Are you confused about how to bring about motivation vs. intention? It’s not uncommon to be confused about these difficulties. In our modern society, messages intended to distract us are everywhere. Sometimes these messages try to persuade us to buy into a fad or product. Getting you onto that conveyor belt of attempting to acquire and invest time and money, only to be unfulfilled in the end but to repeat the same cycle. 

Many people today tell me they are unmotivated at work and feel they’ve lost their career direction. More employees than you may think are feeling tired by the daily churn, and they don’t know how to change it! When I meet with them, I typically ask some key questions to see where the lack of interest lies. 

  • Is it due to personal distractions with family or friends?
  • Is it relationship-related issues with team or management?
  • Is it due to pre-existing beliefs or concepts that may need to be renewed?
  • Could it be depression? Have you sought professional consultation?

After some analysis, I find that it is not that many people necessarily lack motivation, but rather have difficulties with intention.

Purpose provides the compass that fuels our minds and bodies to move in a specific direction. Now how do we go about finding purpose? 

It’s quite simple.

I share two important methods of finding intention.

First, volunteer. Don’t think about it; do it. Go out this weekend and find a school, religious organization, municipal supporting event, or service and give your time. 

Volunteering allows your mind to stop focusing on itself. It opens up your thinking towards others and helps you care about an external problem that you may not have considered before. 

Volunteerism exposes you to areas of risk and need in your community and gets you instantly thinking – how can I change some aspect of this outcome into a more positive one? How can I improve the lives of others?

It also gives you the purest sense of intention. Helping, caring, and enabling another human is our foremost purpose. But we forget that sometimes.

Volunteering enhances your beliefs about what is important. It doesn’t require a lot of time or thinking. It requires you to feel and act. That renewed sense of purpose fuels your intention towards your future. 

Secondly, mentorship. I suggest entering a mentorship relationship with a peer or colleague. Mentorship allows us to focus our attention on another person’s inquiry, leveraging our own experience and knowledge to solve a problem and focus away from our own pain points. People find it highly satisfactory to support others ahead of themselves. Still, it is through an interaction of mentoring and helping that often we find the answers to our issues. 

I often say that everyone should mentor as we all have something to offer and learn in this enriching professional relationship. 

Do you specialize in a specific skill set, industry insight, or business strategy or methodology? Someone within or outside your professional circle is looking for guidance, and it only takes a few meetings a month to connect and follow up on a specific area of interest or need. Those meetings could make a real difference in a professional’s work-life. 

Are you ready to better understand and master the mental and emotional parts of striving for a successful career and a balanced life? CFIR’s Career and Workplace Service can help! 

THE CBT CLINIC and CPRI (Centre pour les Relations Interpersonelles – services in French) Grand Opening is January 2023!